Saturday, July 24, 2010

"PRIDE"; is it truly worth it?

These past few days I have been doing alot of thinking. And as my lack of posts has shown, I have been thinking more philosophically and deeper about things.  Why we do things, what our motivations are, etc... (btw, thanks for those who have been commenting, it is very much appreciated).

Through my discussions with my husband, about negativity - which you will be seeing a post on soon - as well as "gay issues" in general, I have come to a very startling conclusion. Though I am still very very concerned about gay rights and equality in the world. I have been coming at it from the wrong direction. I have been attacking, rather than dialogging. I have been angry rather than understanding. I have been shouting rather than listening. Why is this? Has my "pride" in who I am gotten in the way of my relationships? Has my passion been misplaced, or better yet, misdirected? In what way have I bettered myself through the "dialog" of anger and reactionary words? These are issues that have been occupying my mind of late, and ones that I am still dealing with.

I have read, over and over, angry homosexuals,  their rants and raves; calling those who don't agree with them the nastiest things. Is this the positive dialog that we need? Would the great civil rights leaders of our time, Martin Luther King Jr. or Gandhi utilize the hatred of our tactics? We have become, in our anger at being unequal, exactly what we are trying to fight against. Those against us use fear and misinformation, and to retaliate, we attack their character. We are no better than they are, we only "look" different.

To my readers, I think that you will be seeing a dramatic shift in this blog. Though I will still cover certain important issues, I will aspire for this to be a blog of questions and positivity. No longer will I spout off in anger, or at least try not to. Instead, I will focus on the really important things. The successes, the philosophy, and the heart of matters. Only through positive dialog will we be able to change the world. Negative gets us nowhere, and only drags us, and those around us, down.


  1. Positive is good but remember there are still many people who who like to kill us if they could. At the moment I am very much on the edge waiting for in the ruling on California's Prop 8. Our issues must once and for all be settled by the supreme court and not the states. I believed that in the early stages of the fight and I have not changed my mind. I believe we went about it all wrong. I am a love exile: meaning my husband and I left the US to live in Germany since it was the only place we could live together. I was living in San Francisco when Gavin Newsome declared gay marriage legal. Immigration had already separated us by nearly year. At the end of June, 2005 I left. We had married in a small village in Germany the year before in 2004. You've inspired me to reblog my one and only LGBT post. Thanks for becoming a follower. Good luck with the blog. Write, write, write.

  2. Hi Joe,

    Thanks for the comment. I understand what you are saying and I agree with you to an extent. Though there are people that want to take away our rights, even kill us, I believe that we dont need to react to those people with anger and resentment. I think that we as a community too often think that we need to be accepted by these people...a topic which I will be writing on in a future post.

    I sympathize with you having to be a love exile. I am in the same position, as I am married and am living in Canada. Hopefully one day the U.S. Congress will pass the Uniting American Families Act.


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